waste

i think one of the saddest things to hear when someone passes is, "he
had such potential." i am trying hard to avoid the regret of what
might have been. i do not like anything that evokes the words, "if
only." i have dreams. i am striving toward them, though, i'll be
honest, i am at a loss as to how to proceed with some of them. others
are a timing thing and patience is my best weapon. i do not know what
will happen. i don't know if there is some grand plan for me. am i
already living it, and my efforts to be doing something else just
futile railing against the master plan?

i don't know.

i keep working, creating, and time passes strangely. the weeks pass
quicker than the hours, the years pass faster than the days. i make
less progress than i'd like, than i imagine i could. i keep trying
though. i can't give up. there is nothing else in this world for me
should i throw in the towel. i simply cannot abide the "if only."

ghost