join me

i think it might be a good thing that we can't undo the past. if we
were able, would we ever move forward in time? or would we be forever
attempting to perfect our moments, going back again and again,
changing this and that, continually tinkering, unsatisfied with the
course of our lives? it's like all of those time travel movies. one
moment undone in innocence throws everything else out of kilter. who
wouldn't go back, if he/she could, and try to change our mistakes? our
embarrassments? i'm sure most people, like me, couldn't be trusted
with that kind of power. we see too little and think it's the whole
picture. we are entirely too self centered.

it's better to find a purpose for what has happened, i think. this is
also fraught with the dangers of myopia, though. we snap up any
reasons which fit our wants and viewpoints. it's also little comfort
when your heart has been torn out and stomped if someone tells you it
is meant to be. because f*ck that. you know? perhaps the healthiest
(and hardest) thing to do is move on, and not dwell. if there is a
purpose, it has the habit of revealing itself at the oddest times, and
we are forced to see how small our picture plays in the grand
choreography of this life. forcing the picture never quite works out.

so, join me in my attempt to take my own advice. let go of the past.
it won't go anywhere. what good is it to count your bruises? it is in
us to persevere, and sometimes we don't know why. all we can do is
keep one eye out for the future that's always rushing toward us, and
the other to the sky should a sign ignite.

ghost